Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Post-Akin, Let's Have A Sir Bedevere Litmus Test For GOP Candidates

As we await 5 pm and hope Congressman Akin sees the light and steps down, this seems like an opportune time to propose a Sir Bedevere test for aspiring GOP candidates.

First, though, let's congratulate Senator McCaskill - she clearly viewed Akin as her weakest prospective opponent, and I think it safe to say that her judgement has been vindicated. Well played, Madam Senator.

Akin's now notorious comments played into the Democratic war-on-women meme, but while it has gotten far less attention, they also reinforce the Republicans-are-anti-science meme.

And I have to say, I am fascinated by Akin's implication that there exists some sort of natural ovarian rape shield through which the female body intuits the intentions of a woman and her partner in coitus and somehow thwarts conception under coercion. Enough with the mea culpas, I want to learn more about these new biological insights.

When I first heard what Akin had said, the first thing that popped into my mind was King Arthur saying the Bedevere, "This new learning amazes me Sir Bedevere. Explain again how sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent earthquakes."

Maybe that's what Akin has in mind; surely there is no way for a woman to become pregnant as a result of rape... if she is a witch! It's simple; rape kits just need to include a live duck, so we can weigh the victim:

Which brings me to my modest proposal: henceforth, all GOP candidates must meet the Sir Bedevere test of familiarity with, and general acceptance of, modern science. Not in a way that precludes people with mainstream religious views from running for office, but in a way that weeds out people inclined to go on television and spew medievalism all over themselves and the rest of the party.

1 comment:

  1. The problem is this will be the first step. Once we hang one of our own over something like this, the bar keeps getting raised (or lowered, depending how you look at it), and pretty soon religious people won't be able to run for office because of their beliefs.

    All because we continue to play the left's game.